Before Christmas, I Facebooked thusly:
Well, Santa didn’t leave either of those items under the tree for P Motion. Instead he left a pogo stick, along with a gift card redeemable at our local emergency room.
However, P Motion did get a lizard for his 6th birthday from his mom and dad.
IDIOT! Don’t you remember your own horrific tales of Hopper the Bastard Rabbit*?
Of course I remember. But if there’s one thing I’ve learned as a parent, it’s that I’m not obligated to learn anything from my mistakes. In fact, it’s probably better if I don’t.
Plus the kid really wanted a lizard.
So KAW did the research, and last Friday a terrarium, 50 live crickets, and a hypo high yellow designer leopard gecko arrived at our house via UPS. And, yes, our car insurance went down 15% within 15 minutes of its arrival.
But P Motion’s birthday wasn’t until Monday.
For three days, the gecko now known as Ecko (really) lived in our bedroom closet. And, amazingly enough, we actually managed to keep all of the kids out.
However, we didn’t manage to keep all of the crickets in (feel free to insert a witty bit of entomological humor concerning insects coming out of a closet here). In fact, a cricket just went hopping across the kitchen floor as I write this. Swear.
But finally, Monday we gathered the crew, blindfolded our New Year’s Boy, told him to put his hands out, and sat his present on his hand.
Then we removed the blindfold.
Then we observed a reaction that is very non-typical P Motion (still and silent).
Then he let out a little squeak of disbelief.
Then he and Ecko were bum-rushed by his siblings, who were anything but still and silent. See for yourself.
A few observations:
1. Hellcat is three-quarters howler monkey as judged by the un-Godly decibel level used when speaking to (shouting at) others who are less than a half-foot away; the way that she bounces around on a near-continual basis; and her very hairy arms (and back).
2. Our furniture, which we’ve had for just about six months, isn’t likely to last another six months at the frenetic pace with which or children tromp all over it.
3. KAW is very quick to say that no, geckos don’t ever bite you.
4. Slim got those pajamas for Christmas. We refer to them as the Pink Bunny Pajamas from Aunt Clara.
5. Geckos feel like lizards.
6. Reptiles generally make for happy kids.
7. Ecko has to be thinking, “Son of a — why don’t little old ladies get geckos as pets?”
A week in, both boy and lizard are doing fine. Ecko has even shed his skin once, which seems very symbolic for the new year.
But then we think he ate it, which isn’t quite as symbolic.
*****
*Hopper Update: This past summer, I convinced P Motion that we should release Hopper from his hutch and let him run wild and unrestrained as all bastard animals that crap a lot should. I fully hoped expected that he’d be eaten by the neighbor’s dog or some other type of carnivore within a week.
He wasn’t. I’m happy to report that Hopper is still roaming the range, crapping frequently and freely.
I’d invest in hand sanitizer…
Lil diva is also part howler monkey. I can just image the decibels reached if our kids were ever in the same room.
For Ecko or the kids?
Pretty sure all kids are part howler monkey. Some are just howlier. And hairier.
I love his reaction. It’s like out of the Magic Treehouse (“and then everything was still. . . absolutely still.”)
You scored with the PJ’s this year- we couldn’t find anything awesome.
His reaction was priceless. So was my mom’s (the more audilbe gasp after his).
It was a banner PJ year, for sure. Still not so sure I wouldn’t like some footies.
Great gift! I am amazed that all four kids reacted so well to having a gecko dropped into their hands. I know for a definite fact that my sister(s) would have run shrieking from the room as if Godzilla himself was on their trail. I’m not even that sure of my brother.
Honestly, I’m surprised Hellcat didn’t bite the head off the thing.
I am a huge fan of reptiles as pets! We have had lots of them. We don’t have cricket-eaters anymore, but we used to breed leopard geckos. I bought my crickets by the 1000. Those little turds can chew through cardboard, and the first giant box I ever bought resulted in hundreds of crickets free-roaming my house. The cats had a ball.
It seems like there are a 1000 crickets hopping around here.
My son had a gecko for two years. And although it was a challenge (read: giant pain in the ass) and a bit pricey (meal worms, crickets, food for the crickets, anorexia paste when “Speedy” started to starve himself) I mostly don’t regret it.
Mostly.
Jack learned lessons in responsibility and genuinely cared for his lizard.
I learned NOT to take a lizard to an exotic pet vet.
If you want to send your kids to college someday, that is.
Anorexia paste? Now I’m thinking Hopper wasn’t such an a-hole.
Hooray for P Motion. We continue to struggle with pets in the Jacobson household.
Dog: Fail
Cat: Fail
Goldfish: Fail, fail, fail
Tropical Fish: Ich and now a chronically cloudy tank.
Can we have some of your crickets?
They are a pretty good pet actually. Hardy. Yet crunchy.
Ugh. Bad wireless. Can’t get video in RV.
But geckos. Loved them. Had some wild ones who hung out in our apartment in Thailand. Every now and then we’d find on dead in a large water glass, tailless. Found another skewered on a large paperclip in binder at work.
Sherlock never came to investigate…
Can’t wait to see the vid!
Wow. Such a heartwarming testimonial. At least Hopper’s bastard ass hasn’t shown up dead or skewered.
Always love reading your posts Chase. I love the way you love your life. It’s a beautiful thing. So, I’ve nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award. Check out the details below and then you can decide what to do with your shiny, green, cyber award. Cheers!
http://talesfromthemotherland.me/2012/01/05/tales-from-the-motherland-has-been-awarded-the-versatile-blogger-award/
Thank you!
Excellent choice of lizard/ b-day gift! I had a lizard, but I had the added bonus that my mom was deathly afraid it was going to crawl into her brain or something.
KAW is more freaked out by the crickets than the gecko.
Awww, yay. When can we start taking bets on when Ecko will get lost in the couch?
Miss that young kids with new pets thing. Your kids so respectful- they don’t grab and squeeze, their hands dance with the gecko. Maybe they vocalize but their physical reactions are choreography.
Beautiful.
They really were pretty good with him. Kind of cool to see all their hands in there sharing him.
I think Hellcat wants one of her own.
Ecko hasn’t been in the freezer, has he?